Tomato Garden
very thoughtful story...
An old man lived alone. He wanted to plant his annual
tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, as the ground was hard.
His only son, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man
wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament:
Dear Son,
I am feeling pretty sad, because it looks like I won't be able to plant my
tomato garden this year. I'm just getting too old to be digging up a garden
plot. I know if you were here my troubles would be over.. I know you would
be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days.
Love, Dad
A few days later he received a letter from his son.
Dear Dad,
DON'T DIG UP THAT GARDEN!!!! That's where the cash from the robbery is.
Love,
Your Son
At 4 a.m. the next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up
the entire area without finding any money. They apologized to the
old man and left.
That same day the old man received another letter from his son.
Dear Dad,
Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That's the best I could do.
Love you, Your son
IT Technical Support
A woman writes to the IT Technical support Guy
Dear Tech Support ,
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and I noticed a distinct slowdown in the overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0 .
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as
Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as NEWS 5.0, MONEY 3.0 and CRICKET 4.1 .
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and House cleaning 2. 6 simply crashes the system.
Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5..3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________
Reply
DEAR Madam,
First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme. html and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.
If that application works as designed, Husband1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5..
However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Silence 2.5 or Beer 6.1 .
Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.
Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)
In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0 .
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.
You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance.
We recommend: Cooking 3.0 and Hot Looks 7.7.
Good Luck Madam!
English is a very difficult language - FOR SOME!
I dont know if you will find it funny...
my friend just forwarded this news clip to me.
GM (General Motors) VS. Microsoft
A friend forwarded this to my email today and i was laughing my ass out after reading it.
-----
At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, “If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon.”
In response to Bill’s comments, General Motors issued a press release stating: If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:
1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally, your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.
4. Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive – but would run on only five percent of the roads.
6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single “This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation” warning light.
7. The airbag system would ask, “Are you sure?” before deploying.
8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lift the door handle, turned the key, and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
10. You’d have to press the “Start” button to turn the engine off.GIRLS DIARY V/S BOYS DIARY
Day night, I thought he was acting
weird. We had made
plans to meet at a
cafe to have some coffee. I was
shopping with my friends
all day long, soI
thought he was upset at the fact that I
was
a bit
late,
but he made no
comment.Conversation wasn't flowing so
I suggested that
we go somewhere
quiet so we could talk, he agreed but
he kept quiet and
absent.I
Asked
him what was wrong - he
said,
"Nothing."I asked him if
it was my fault
that he was upset. He said it
had
nothing to do with me
and not to worry.
On the way home I told him that I
loved
him, he simply
smiled and kept
driving. I can't explain his
behavior; I don't know
why he didn't say,
"I love u, too."When we got home I felt
as if I had lost
him, as if he
wanted nothing to do with me anymore.
He just sat
there and watched TV.
He seemed distant and absent.Finally I
decided to go to
bed. About 10
minutes later he came to bed. I decided
that I could not
take it anymore,
so I decided to confront him with the
situation but he
had fallen asleep.I
started crying and cried until I too
fell asleep. I
don't know what to
do. I'm almost sure that his thoughts
are with someone
else. My life is a
disaster.
HIS DIARY
Today India lost the cricket match
against Pakistan .
DAAM IT.
NOW that's called
Simplicity of Men
Vs
Complexity of Women !!!
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